Thirteen Troublesome Questions
by Debbo Kakashi Hatake
Summary: Nara Shikamaru was never the kind to poke into people's business. Until a certain Hyuuga dissolved that rather quickly. ShikaNeji. OOC in first four chapters. Gif Fic for Winterblazewolf!
1. First Troublesome Question

Yo guys! Yes, this is another wonderful gif fic for my wonderful friend, Winterblazewolf! :D Have fun reading it! :D

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"_I, Nara Shikamaru, have always pondered over these thirteen questions, even though they're as troublesome as the Hyuuga himself."_

**First Question's Always The Worst**

Nara Shikamaru went to his favourite cloud-watching spot. He always does. But today, he was thinking rather than cloud-watching. Shikamaru ran his fingers through his brown ponytail and sighed.

_I wonder why Hyuuga Neji has straight and smooth hair._

Nara tried to dismiss it, but he couldn't. In fact, he was dying to know why that Hyuuga has hair like that. He had to ask him. His brown eyes had a tinge of curiosity in them as he began to ponder.

Finally, he gave in to himself and off he went to the Hyuuga's household to ask one troublesome question.

0oo0oo0

"Come in," Neji yelled at the door. Shikamaru bit his lip. This is all wrong. So wrong. He was supposed to be relaxing peacefully at his spot! What was he doing here? Shikamaru contemplated to turn around and run for his life until he heard a soft turn of the door knob.

The Hyuuga prodigy looked a little shocked as he opened the door to reveal a lazy ninja standing in his way. Neji raised an eyebrow, "What are you doing here?" Shikamaru cleared his throat, "I'm here to ask you a- uh- question."

Shikamaru felt like kicking himself. _Well, at least make something up! What in the world were you thinking?! _Even though the ninja was about to explode on the inside, his calm and cool exterior never failed to cease from his face.

Neji shot him a quizzical glance. Shikamaru sighed, "Well, if you're not in the least interested, I'll go ask Naruto. I'm sure he would know the answer." In actual fact, he knew Naruto wouldn't be interested in these nonsensical things. Naruto was always lacking the brains for anything, so he doubted he had the answer.

"Go on," Neji opened the door for the Nara to come in. Shikamaru sat on his bed as he began, "I was thinking…" Shikamaru cringed. He felt uncomfortable as he carried on with the sentence, "…Why is your hair so nice and straight?"

Shikamaru could have sworn Neji enjoyed every minute of that. The Hyuuga pursed his lips, in a desperate attempt to suppress his laughter. Shikamaru rolled his eyes, "What? It was just an honest question!" Neji smirked, "I actually bathe twice a day, unlike somebody in this room."

Shikamaru's jaw dropped, "Bathe twice a day? Who bathes twice a day?"

Neji grinned, "Obviously not you."

Shikamaru felt offended, "You sound as if I've never bathed before."

Neji smiled, "Well, I don't know anything about your bathing habits, my dear Nara. Why don't you answer that yourself?"

Shikamaru gritted his teeth. This guy was clearly trying to test his patience.

"I bet you've never killed anything in your whole sixteen years of life." Shikamaru glared at the prodigy.

Neji maintained a straight face, "Yes, I have. I'm going to kill a deer later."

Shikamaru snorted, "A deer? Come on, all you know how to do is to say 'Byakugan' in this squeaky, high-pitched voice,"

Neji held his tongue back. He knew Hinata would faint if she would be able to hear the amount of vulgarities he planned on blurting out if he did not control his behaviour.

"Well, that can always be arranged. After all, I have a deer here, don't I?"

Shikamaru groaned softly. He hated his surname 'Nara'. He remembered when Kiba and Naruto used to make fun of it when they were young. It was like déjà vu all over again. And this particular Nara had a feeling he was going to get his ass kicked again anytime soon.

"Hand me that newspaper please." Neji had a fake smile plastered on his face as he gestured towards the paper. Shikamaru had doubts, but he carefully picked it up and nicely handed it to the Hyuuga with a big, bright smile.

"Happy?"

Neji smirked, "Why, of course. You actually complied." He had a small laugh before continuing, "Therefore, you're going to become my slave until the end of this week."

Shikamaru stared at the Hyuuga in disbelief, "You've got to be kidding me."

Neji chuckled evilly, "Oh no, I'm not. You're going to stay here and serve me until the week is over. No exceptions."

Shikamaru sighed, "Me and my troublesome questions."

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Heehee. Here you go! Hope you liked it! :D Please review! XD


	2. Bigmouth Shikamaru

Yo guys! Haha, I hope this chapter is okay :D I warn you, this chapter MAY have slight OOC. But promise, it's only a little XD Enjoy!

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_"I didn't know how I did it, but the second question just came out."_

**Big-mouth Shikamaru**

"Shika-kun!"

Shikamaru groaned. He swore this was at least the fifth time Neji called him- in an _hour. _He hastily picked up the broom on the floor and hurried to the 'heiress', or so Shikamaru calls him.

"I better make sure my hair is in place. That way, I won't get another hair lecture from that Hyuuga again," Shikamaru smirked as he muttered under his breath. He remembered just yesterday when his hair was out of place from doing too much gardening- Neji actually lectured him and gave him a whole cupboard of hair products to use. To tell the truth, Shikamaru actually enjoyed the session, which included the prodigy actually helping him wash his hair- complete with blow-drying and conditioner!

It was like a package he just couldn't resist. After all, his hair did _almost _feel and look as smooth as Neji's. But, of course, he couldn't forget the amount of dishwashing he did after that for compensation… He'd rather do the gardening, seriously.

"Yes, your majesty?" Shikamaru had his usual bored look spread across his face as he inwardly sighed, '_No, don't tell me you want another cup of coffee. No, not another cheesecake too!' _He raised an eyebrow at the older Hyuuga, waiting for the latter to make up his mind.

"I want… you to get me Hinata. I need to tell her something important." Shikamaru's eyebrow twitched. The Hyuuga didn't say anything, but the Nara knew that he was just trying really hard to piss him off. I mean couldn't he just called her by himself?!

"Yes, your highness." Shikamaru could think of what the others would say if they found him in Neji's house, doing _housework_. He wondered why he ever had a mouth when he wasn't able to keep a secret that could have been forgotten in like an hour or two! Why must he suffer like this?! Why must he succumb to having to serve the arrogant Hyuuga for even a second?

**WHY?!**

"Oh and before you think that this is unfair to you, let me set this straight." He got up from his chair and stood in front of the Nara.

"This is solely because of your actions against me. You may find me the most arrogant and demanding asshole in Konoha, but, seriously, I don't give a damn. Just be a good _maid_ and run along to tell Hinata the news."

"Okay," Shikamaru had a small- fake- smile on as he quietly agreed to the bastard of a Hyuuga's torture. _Maid?! Who does he think he is? Bill Gate's son?!_

Shikamaru was about to turn to leave until he thought of a question. A question he had been thinking about all along, but never did ask the older boy. The Nara bravely walked towards Neji.

Now, I say bravely because Shikamaru was going to get his ass kicked by the time he finishes his sentence.

"Neji," Shikamaru took in a deep breath as he bit his lip and clenched his fist.

"…Do you have _periods_?"

Shikamaru saw Neji's vein burst in his brain as the latter picked up his kunai and dangerously pointed it at the former's throat, "And why is that?" Shikamaru really didn't want to get himself killed, honestly, but he just had to spit it out. After all, he was going to die from embarrassment once word of this… thing spreads around.

"…You seem to have mood swings." Shikamaru closed his eyes as he imagined the Hyuuga trying to kill him with a katana. Or whatever he had in his hand. (Even a coin! No kidding!)

That. Was. The. Last. Straw!

"Nara," Neji placed his hand (with the kunai, mind you.) on Shikamaru's shoulder. "Thank you for being such a sweetheart, but really," He smirked. "Who is the one who really has a period?"

Shikamaru couldn't understand what the Hyuuga was saying at first. Clearly, he was the one who has issues, not the poor Nara deer here. But suddenly, he felt a sharp pain on his shoulder. He grabbed his shoulder, confused at first. But he managed to gather enough strength to turn his head and look. Blood oozed out from the deep cut made from the kunai Neji had.

Suddenly, his world turned black…

0oo0oo0

"OW! Careful, you idiot!" Shikamaru growled at the Hyuuga, who was trying to clean his wound. The latter smiled apologetically as he dabbed it lightly.

"This is all because of you. Wonder why I ever asked that stupid question in the first place. I was obviously trying to commit suicide." Shikamaru kept on glaring at Neji until he finally stopped. He noticed the Hyuuga was quiet.

"Oi, baka, why are you so silent?" Shikamaru was worried. I mean Neji always had something to retort- wait. What is he talking about? No, he doesn't feel **worried** about that bastard. He doesn't.

"Nothing. Just thinking how else I can kill you without you whining." He grinned as he placed another antiseptic wipe on the Nara's wounded shoulder, "Fuck! It hurts, be careful!" Shikamaru chided the older boy as he forcefully pressed on the cut.

"Fine, I'm sorry, okay? Sheesh, you just had to make me feel _guilty_…" Neji's voice trailed off the moment he heard what he had just blurted out. Wh-what did he say? **Guilty?** Since when did Hyuuga Neji ever feel guilty?! _Since when did I ever regret what I did? _

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow at the prodigy. _He's freaky today… _He inwardly smiled as he cringed at the pain once again.

Neji then realized how close he was to the deer. Their noses were just an inch away. As Neji looked into those brave, beautiful eyes, he felt a slight blush creep up from behind.

_He sure has kissable lips… _Shikamaru mentally slapped himself. _I've been around Naruto too much, haven't I? _He inwardly sighed as he took a glance at those lips once more.

Before they realized what they were doing, a very shy Hyuuga Hinata stood at the doorway, giggling. "Oh, I-I won't d-disturb. E-enjoy!" She giggled like a schoolgirl again as she smiled to herself. _Finally, Neji-san has found true love! _

Neji and Shikamaru just remained in the same position for a while until Shikamaru took in a deep breath,

"What the fuck did we just do?"

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Heehee. Hope it was okay! In the meantime, please review! :D Thanks!


	3. My Mind Says Otherwise

Hello guys! Thanks for reviewing the first couple of chapters! Hope you like this chapter :D On with the show!

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"_What just happened?"_

**My Mind Says Otherwise**

As you guessed it, Neji had been avoiding Shikamaru ever since the incident. No surprise there, given how much his pride and ego means to the Hyuuga. Shikamaru, on the other hand, didn't really cared that much. After all, it was just a kiss!

…Or so it seemed.

"Nara!" Neji stood in front of the teenager, his arms folded, stoic mask in place. Shikamaru sighed, "What is the problem now?" The prodigy pointed to the pile of dishes at the sink, "Do it. Now."

The Nara could feel the pair of beautiful lilac eyes burning a hole through his face. So, as to not cause another fight to take place, he swiftly walked to the kitchen and turned on the water tap.

Neji could feel his heart flutter when he saw Shikamaru. It was as if, he felt so light, he could be lifted off the ground with even the lightest wind. But, of course, Hyuuga Neji _never _admitted how he felt to anyone- even to himself.

"Can I ask you something?" The Hyuuga looked the Nara straight in his eye. The latter shrugged, "Depends on what you're asking." Neji sighed and continued, "I was thinking… Why did you even agree to become my maid in the first place?"

Suddenly, it was as if time stopped. Shikamaru placed the dish he was washing down and looked Neji in the eye. His hazel eyes met the prodigy's purple ones and Neji could feel his heart palpitating even faster than before. He loved his eyes. To Neji, it made even the simplest things around him become so sophisticated and beautiful.

Shikamaru sighed, "Because I…"

"Neji! Naruto's at the door!" Hinata popped her head into the kitchen. Neji briefly nodded and reluctantly left the Nara to himself. The latter turned around to see the blonde waving to both of them at the doorstep, not knowing he interrupted possibly the most important conversation to Neji.

But after all, you can't blame the dumbass for being a dumbass.

--

"Hi Neji!" Uzumaki Naruto beamed at his friend. The Hyuuga rolled his eyes, obviously annoyed by the blonde's sudden intrusion.

"What do you want?" Neji wasn't in the best of his moods, which was pretty obvious, if you take into account what just happened yesterday…

"What's with that tone? Anyway, I was hoping…" Naruto gestured towards Hyuuga Hinata, who was on the phone, at the moment. Neji twitched an eyebrow.

"You want me to ask Hinata to go over to your house for your 'birthday party'? Hey, we've played that trick to Hinata so many times. I'm sure she'll know one way or another."

Naruto pleaded with him, "Please…? Just think up of an excuse for me! Please!"

The prodigy sighed, "Really, you should get some balls and just ask her out."

"Well, how am I supposed to do that if I am not given the opportunity?"

Neji blinked, "Gosh, you're such a moron," He pointed to his cousin, "Isn't opportunity shining down on you right now?"

Naruto scratched the back of his head. He really didn't know what to do! You know how uncomfortable he was before when he was having a crush on Sakura. Now that he has a thing for the younger Hyuuga, why should he be any different this time round?

"Hinata!" Almost immediately, Hinata turned around. "Naruto wants to talk to you about something!" Neji smirked as his cousin walked towards the pair, completely unaware of Neji's intentions. Naruto shot his friend a 'you're-so-dead' look and plastered a huge smile on his face.

"Hey, Hinata."

"H-hello, N-Naruto."

Silence.

"…I was thinking…" Naruto could feel his heart beat faster with every word spoken. What's with him and pretty girls?!

"…Are you free tonight?"

Hinata had a surprised look on her face as she turned to look at her cousin. Neji's smirk grew larger over the conversation, as so it seemed. Shikamaru peered out from the kitchen, amused by the shyness of Uzumaki. He sounded a lot like a girl.

'_What a loser.' _

Shikamaru grinned as he remembered what Sasuke said to Naruto on the first day of school. It really was hilarious. Especially with the kiss…

"See you later, Shikamaru!" Naruto's happy tone suddenly brought the Nara back to Earth.

'_Oh. So, the dumbass gets the girl and I, the handsome one, am still the bachelor? Oh, very nice.'_

Shikamaru waved as Uzumaki left the house, a big, broad smile etched to his face. Shikamaru sighed. Oh well, at least he won't be whining to him the next couple of weeks about his failed romance.

As if there was any romance.

"Nara, aren't you suppose to be doing something?" Neji, with his arms folded across his chest, asked the deer. Hinata just smiled and went up to her room, wondering what she should wear this evening along the way.

"I…I have a question to ask you."

Neji stopped in his tracks, listening intently to Shikamaru. What exactly did he have to ask again?

"Why do you want your cousin to go out with a dimwit like _him_?"

Shikamaru swore Neji bit his lip in order not to laugh. The latter smirked, "Well, I guess Hinata has worse taste in men than _me_."

He shot him a fake smile and went up to his room for a little privacy of his own.

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow. '_What? Wait a minute. He's actually interested in somebody other than himself? Right…_'

The Nara thought long and hard. Who had the charm and charisma to actually manage Hyuuga Neji to be interested in him? Well, it definitely had to be a guy, as he stated (phew, at least hope was not gone for our dear Nara.). So, Tenten had to be out.

'_Hah. As if Tenten had a better chance than me. Wait. No, no! What's wrong with me?!'_

Shikamaru shook his head. He was having some serious mental problems as of late. How could he even consider himself being with that arrogant guy? No, he wasn't interested in him!

Meanwhile, Neji wasn't fairing any better.

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Hope this was alright. Reviews equals love equals more chapters. Haha :D

**I'll worship those who leave a review to keep me going! :D **


	4. Dress Code

Yo guys! Haha. I'm back! Sorry for the long wait. Special thanks to Winterblazewolf. She was the one who inspired the first part XD Haha. And I bring you... Chapter 4!

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_"Wait. That looks familiar."_

**Dress Code**

"I like him?"

"No, you don't. Get a hold on yourself. It's an asshole you're supposedly interested in. You're the Hyuuga Neji. You shouldn't get yourself to such a low level."

"But…"

"No buts. Seriously, what do you see in him? He's just a self-centered pineapple head who is good-for-nothing."

"…Neji?"

Suddenly, as if he was jolted back to reality, Neji found himself facing his cousin, Hanabi, who was standing at the door, her foot tapping lightly on the carpeted floor. She had a smirk plastered on her face as Neji eyed her suspiciously.

"Yes, Hanabi? What are you doing here?"

"Oh nothing," She grinned. "Just checking to see if 'Belle' is still mad at the 'Beast'. He's downstairs trying to make you breakfast!"

Neji raised an eyebrow, "Breakfast?"

Hanabi cleared her throat before she muttered under her breath, "If you call that pile of burnt pancakes breakfast…"

Neji felt a small smile curled up on his slightly pink lips, but before Hanabi could cry out what she saw, the smile was gone in a blink of an eye, dissolved like a cube of sugar in coffee.

'_Hee hee, so he does have feelings…_' Hanabi inwardly smirked as she turned to leave the room, "You better come down. Or else I'll help you finish your share!" She cheekily grinned and left an inch of the door opened.

"That girl…" Neji shook his head and let a small laugh escape from his lips. Before he knew it, his legs carried him downstairs, to where Shikamaru was.

--

"It's always 'Shikamaru do this' 'Shikamaru do that.'" Shikamaru sighed. "When is it time to say, 'Shikamaru, I have a crush on you' or something?"

"…No time is that time, huh?"

Just then, Neji appeared at the door of the kitchen, his usual stoic mask in place. Shikamaru couldn't believe it was the Hyuuga. Why? Simple. He was simply dressed in a peach turtleneck and a pair of slightly faded jeans; unlike his usual kimono-like outfit he wears everyday.

"Whoa… What happened to you?" Shikamaru stood there in shock.

"Nothing. You must need glasses. I suggest you eat more carrots to strengthen that eyesight of yours." Neji rolled his eyes and brushed past the 'maid' as Hanabi sniggered, walking behind the older Hyuuga.

"Looks like today isn't your day!" Hanabi said in a sing-song voice as she passed by the Nara, who was obviously bloody hell pissed.

…Not like any one wouldn't be.

Shikamaru bit his lip. This would be his fourth stupid question. His fourth! Where was his dignity? Where was his pride?!

Wait.

…Was he counting how many questions he asked?

He bumped his head on the wall, "Neji!"

The latter turned around; a suspicious yet curious look on his face, "Yes?"

Shikamaru groaned. He was going to get boiled, fried or any other variation of cooked.

He was going to be toast.

"You see, I saw a couple of designer coats in your wardrobe…"

Neji raised an eyebrow, "What? You want those girly jackets?"

Shikamaru gave him a disgusted look, "No. It's just…"

The Hyuuga inched a little closer to Shikamaru, "What?"

The Nara cringed, "Where did you buy those?"

Hanabi jumped in, "Ah hah! I knew you wanted it!" She high-fived Neji.

"No!" Shikamaru shook his head. "I thought…"

Neji folded his arms across his chest, "Nara, do you want me to blast you to the next universe before you actually tell me what you want to say?" Shikamaru rolled his eyes. As he did, he swore he heard the Hyuuga's little cousin giggle once more.

"I thought I saw those in the _girl's_ section." Shikamaru finally finished his sentence. Hanabi had to bite her lip to suppress her laughter. Neji cringed ever so slightly at the comment. Not only was it insulting his manliness, but he really _did _shop at the girl's section.

Firstly, men's clothes were too big for the dear Hyuuga. Secondly, he got the kick out of guys who said the clothes looked fantastic on him- at the same time complaining that they couldn't find it _anywhere_. Let's just say he was quite a selfish person, who also didn't like to follow the common trend.

But never did he know any guy would have the guts to step into the girl's section of the shop. It was common knowledge that guys who shopped there are deemed sissy or gay by the others. (Though in real life, he really is! Gay, I mean.) But Neji could disguise himself so well, with the _extremely _light make-up and kimono-like outfit. I mean… You don't exactly see Naruto or Sasuke wearing that. No way.

"I know you must think I'm stupid or whatever and it probably isn't the slightest bit the truth, but… I thought I saw Tenten walking out of the mall carrying that in her hand." Shikamaru closed his eyes, readying himself for the great impact that was sure to come his way.

Neji cursed inwardly. _Did he mean to tell me that I have the same bad fashion sense that Tenten has? Look at those two stupid-looking buns on her head! _He swore he was never going to wear that coat again. Never.

"Oh, look who shops at the girl's section!" Hanabi laughed as she pointed to Shikamaru. "Seriously, which guy would know which coat is which? Any guy would be ignorant about those tiny details- except you, Nara Shikamaru."

Shikamaru groaned mentally, _'What the hell. She sounds exactly like him…_'

Neji smiled, "I'll be off then, Nara. Call me if you need anything." Then without further ado, he strutted off to the living room, Hanabi trailing closely behind. The latter playfully stuck out her tongue and waved goodbye.

Shikamaru sighed. He regretted asking that so much. He wished he was an ostrich and try to dig a hole to hide his pineapple head.

"Thanks, Hanabi." Neji gratefully smiled at his little cousin as soon as he was out of hearing distance from the Nara. Hanabi had a shocked look on her face,

"Wow. Neji _smiled_ at me."

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Here you go! Hoped you liked it XD Haha. Please review! It's what keeps me going! :D


	5. A Hole

Hi! Yes, another chapter after so long xD Have fun!

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**Shikamaru's Thoughts**

Wow. That's the most amazing eyes I have ever seen. I never thought I would look into those lavender eyes and think about…

What am I talking about?

No way am I going to fall prey to that beast!

Do you see the way he snaps at people, or how when he demands something, he wants it like immediately? This is outrageous! How can I like him?

Just the mere thought of falling in love with the ebony haired genius makes me cringe with such disgust, it's just indescribable. Imagine this – nagging in your bloody ear every day and night, which will end up in arguments and possibly fist fights. I definitely don't want to be with him, right?

But have you ever encountered a situation where you don't know what to do even when you're really sure that's not what you want to do?

Alright. I don't think I was making myself clear.

I like Hyuuga Neji.

Is that enough for you?

**Chapter 5**

"Hanabi?! What in the world did you do to my pants?!" Shikamaru shouted from the bathroom, the lower half of his body covered with a wet towel. He peeked out from the crack of the bathroom door, not believing his eyes.

Where were his pants?!

"I don't care what you did to it, give it back!" Nara groaned, leaning his head against the wall. How was he going to walk out of the house like this? It was early in the morning at seven o'clock when Neji and Hanabi came into his house, with Neji clearly stating that it was nosey Hanabi who dragged him all the way here.

"What the hell is all that noise?"

Neji shouted from the sofa in the living room as he heard a reasonable amount of racket in the washroom.

_I won't be surprised if that_ _idiot was masturbating…_

"Where's your cousin?" Shikamaru walked out of the toilet with his towel still covering the lower part of his muscular body. Neji's eyebrow twitched a little at the sight of the perfect figure. His six packs were so perfectly shaped; Shikamaru really looked nothing like that under all the ANBU uniforms he wore.

"Hanabi went outside. Why?"

Shikamaru, who was currently pissed off, pointed to his towel, "she took my pants."

Neji couldn't help but smirk at the sight. From Shikamaru's point of view, it looked as if the Hyuuga was examining him from top to toe. His lavender eyes curiously went up and down, making poor Nara a little uncomfortable.

"What's that smirk suppose to mean?"

"Let's just say I'm amused at your stupidity – anyone should know better than to put your clothes where Hanabi can reach. She has a bad habit of taking clothes without people's permission."

"…Thanks for the late reminder." Shikamaru rolled his eyes, running his fingers through his brown hair. Neji looked out the window, "I think you better find her – it's most likely out somewhere in the bushes."

"What?!"

"Yes, did I tell you she also has the habit of throwing pants after she does something to it." Neji winked.

"…Does something to it?"

"Yes. She is usually a cheeky girl." Neji smirked. "And you know something? I think I saw her getting a big, huge scissors out of your room…"

Shikamaru's eyes widened in horror.

"HANABI!"

--

"That…was…fun!" Hanabi laughed in between her sentence. Even Neji was biting his lip, trying desperately to stop himself from letting out a small chuckle. Shikamaru wasn't sharing their view on the funny occasion though. In fact, if you looked closely, you could see hot steam sprouting out of his ears.

Shikamaru's face was red with embarrassment. Wait, correction. His face was red with frustration, annoyance and any other variation of extreme annoyance.

"Why. Did. You. Cut. A. Hole. In. My. Pants?" The Nara calmly asked, even though his voice had an underlying tone of anger.

"Because I had nothing to do?" Hanabi looked at Shikamaru with her best doe-like eyes and slowly hid behind Neji, the latter's smirk almost as wide as the width of his lavender eyes.

"And therefore you take my pants, cut a hole where my crotch is, and try to embarrass me in front of your older cousin, Hanabi?"

"Yes!"

"…Now I know why I hate you."

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End of chapter! Hoped you liked it and please review :)


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